Only time will tell… Part 4 💞💟

So just when she thought she had hit rock bottom

Somewhere within a new flower of hope blossomed

She decided to simply live each moment and give all her love

For she realised that she couldn’t unlove

And the only way forward was to let destiny tell its story

So she stopped feeling sor

For; to give love was her choice

Whether she received it or not, was not her voice

And love she got, oh boy

Sure not the way she hoped but love it was, what joy

They lived some of the most magical moments only to be later looked back at with regret.For neither of them knew which way they were headed

Like him, she was unsure too, scared even

But one day, it all became very clear, like some sort of epiphany

He was scared to hope, his fears far outweighed any desire to fly

And they both kept asking why

Why did their paths collide if it weren’t meant to be

It were so much more easier if they’d just stopped by the sea

But now they had set sail and come too far

Yet he was ready to jump off just to save her a lifetime of scar

But boy was she fierce…

He couldn’t let her go, she was one to fight

Her faith didn’t waiver a slight

She had her weak moments, sure

But their love, she knew was pure

So how could she give up, she had to see it through for both of them. And so they prayed, for only HE could set it all right and bring them home, to each other.

And one day, their prayers were answered.

Her belief won,

his worries quashed;

and their love conquered.

He said those three long awaited words

In that moment, she felt like she could fly; be one with the birds

His voice was like music

Symphony just for her ears

Their partnership had just started

The road ahead was definitely not for the fainthearted

So as they sailed into unchartered waters

They had their share of stormy tidewaters

But together they made history

With chimes ringing of their victory

As she walked down the aisle, he was waiting at the altar

Feeling grateful that she didn’t let her faith falter

Because when he looked at her in that white dress, he knew that it was all worth it. That they were both going to be home. And this time, this home had a heartbeat

So fate took its own sweet time to unravel their story. But all in HIS good time ✨

And time finally told 💘❤️

To read the other parts and related poems, follow the links below:

Was it the start of something new?.. Only time could tell

Only time will tell.. Part 2

The story continues

When love wasn’t enough

Only time will tell.. Part 3

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Only time will tell…( Part 3) 💕💔

They knew they would always find a shoulder to cry on and a riot of laughter in each other

They knew they were treading on thin ice

And neither of them liked where they were headed

He had made up his mind, bound by his worldly shackles

And she, she was trying to hold on to the tiny thread of love with all that she had got

She was getting tired of the emotions making a fool of her

But she couldn’t bring herself to walk away

It wasn’t easy for him either, but he chose reality versus their dreams

Or at least that’s what they thought, because it indeed was the right thing

But her candle of hope was still burning strong, which is why it was so hard to let go

But times were getting rough, she wanted more, the lines were getting blurred and it was getting difficult to protect their friendship that they both swore would never fall apart in the wake of this flame of love burning in their hearts

It looked like he was ready to walk away, to save both of them the heart ache

But was that the truth? Would they both in fact walk away from something they knew had the potential to give them an eternity of happiness? Were they ready to walk away or even ready to take the fall? Their lifetime of happiness was just a leap of faith away

Will they make it?

Only time could tell

It’s all about perspective

All that hurt, all that pain; it burnt a hole in her chest. Tired of the internal war raging between her heart and mind, she almost gave up. Just when all hell was set to break loose, she found her grip again. She realised she was stronger than this.

That everey moment every experience was preparing her to be the greatest version of who she really was. And that this milestone she had to accomplish. She was so close. After all her patience. She was finally there. How could she give her peace away so easily? So she stood her ground. Fully knowing and finally accepting her situation.

Acceptance, she learnt came not from excepting but from embracing. Embracing the reality of her experience and then because she didn’t like the outcome, she now knew she could choose how to experience the same outcome differently.

She chose to see the silver lining; which wasn’t so very sliver now. Because you’re unsure of the silver, of what’s behind the cloud. But this, she could clearly see it. The change. Through the change of her perception she could appreciate the change that was right in front of her. How could she then complaint?

Her heart still falters back to old feelings and reckless emotions, but she is learning. She is learning to pick herself up. Rise up from the ashes of her own tears.

Dilemma..🤔🙄

Dearly beloved are you listening?
I can’t remember a word that you were saying
Are we demented or am I disturbed?
The space that’s in between insane and insecure
Oh therapy, can you please fill the void?

Quoting one of my most favourite singers “Billie Joe Armstrong” from his very famous “Jesus of Suburbia” – I think to myself, “Mahn, how can a song written years ago resonate my feelings so accurately?” (although the context is entirely different!)

I can literally feel myself going paranoid over the most trivial things lately because a certain disturbing thought has made its home under my skin. In spite of so many reassurances that I’m really only being stupid and all’s well in the world, I can’t seem to shake it off! Maybe this will work then, well I certainly am counting on it.

You tell me all’s well, that I have nothing to fear

And yet my thoughts seem to dwell, no matter how hard I try to clear

I nag and become annoying and yet you never complain

Can you see that this is exactly the cause of my pain?

Maybe you do or maybe you don’t; maybe you don’t even comprehend

The thing is I need you to say something; my friend

Something, anything. Silence kills me

So you see the problem is probably me, yet I’ve made this about you

Now looking for an answer in this poem, when I really should be saying ” Screw you!”

– To you or to my mind, now that begs the real question! 🤔

Maybe I’ll get an answer or maybe I won’t.

But like I said I’m counting on it ( on you ;))

So who’s coming to my rescue here? I’m waiting for an answer 🙂

A story, a struggle…or was it? 🖤💭

I began writing because initially it seemed like a hobby and then started with this blog a few months later because, well it was all in the rage and somehow I wanted to be a part of it. But also because I wanted to reach out to a large audience; people outside my family and friend circle, who would more often than not, love every article or poem I wrote rather than criticize it when required. So I began this journey 2.5 years ago but somewhere around 6 months ago, marked the beginning of a haitus where I just was not able to sit down and write. No matter how much and whenever I tried, I couldn’t comprehend my thoughts enough to put them on paper.

But if I am being honest, I will have to admit that somehow I didn’t even want to write. At first, I couldn’t see it myself and once when I did, I couldn’t accept the fact that I, who looked for inspiration to write in everyday life, could not come up with anything or rather, chose not to. I stopped doing one of the few things I really loved doing. Somehow in the process, I withdrew myself inside a shell; a protective cone of “writer’s block”. Every time someone asked me when was the next blog coming up, I would very conveniently say “Oh I just haven’t been able to write, facing a writer’s block, you see” and get away with it without even feeling guilty about it.

But the truth is that I was scared. Scared of what I might end up writing. Scared of my feelings. I was afraid that if I caved in to my feelings, the outcome would be the most melancholy piece I’d have ever written. And I was okay with that, to an extent. But what I was not okay with, is that it would mean I would have laid out my heart and inner most feelings open for everyone to read and feel. And I didn’t want that. I wanted to keep it inside, knowing full well that it would destroy me from within without me even realising. But I did realise it, slowly, every day.

Then one day, I finally caved in and sat to write down. It was such a relief to let it out! I wrote a poem, pouring down my heart in that small poem. But I never blogged it because somehow it felt too personal to share with the world to be put it out there in the open. So it’s still there, saved peacefully in my drafts, wondering if it will ever get to see the light of day.

But as I was writing this, tears strolled down my face and now as I am finishing this up, there’s a slight smile on my face because not only have I finally written but also shared my struggle or rather the lack of it, with you all. And although, this still doesn’t guarantee that I will write again anytime soon, I certainly am hopeful that maybe, this is not the end but in fact a new beginning.

Hope to see you guys still there, waiting on the other end!

Thank you for being here and sticking around 🙂 ❤️

And it was just one if those days… 💭

So while returning at the end of a rather weird day where I couldn’t pin point what was bothering me really; walking at the most busiest station in the city – probably one of the most busiest stations of the country! The seamless number of people just creeping out of nowhere literally got me thinking.

How all of those people, returning home after a long day, some joyous for the upcoming weekend, some rather disappointed for havinh to go to work tomorrow on a national holiday when everyone would be celebrating at home, some fired from their jobs, some hired for a new job, some cracking their first deal on their new venture, some returning to an empty home with no one waiting for them while some wishing they would reach just in time to kiss good night to their kids while some going for their very first date or some going through a heartbreak! How everyone has some or the other battle or milestone event that they can’t wait to celebrate while some would silently wipe their tears and pray to the Almighty to put an end to their dark hour.

Just then I realised, how could I be upset for something that I don’t even know is bothering me? How could I let some weird unconscious thought ruin my state of mind? But as they say no point crying over spilt milk, I am going back home with a hopeful thought for a happier tomorrow. And you know what, that’s exactly what it’s going to be tomorrow. Happy

From despair and loneliness to hope (3/3)

With the dawn of sunrise, came the promise of a new day; a new beginning. After twisting & turning with no hope of sleeping and aimlessly walking the night before, now walking along the shore with only the sound of waves and a few birds chirping, I felt the cold crisp morning breeze touch my skin and I let myself soak in the solitude of the empty beach.

Fascinatingly gazing at the orangish pink hues in the otherwise clear blue skies, I knew I had regained my lost perspective.

And although I still tucked my hands in my pockets, I no longer felt lonely. I felt whole; within myself. Whole enough to enjoy that bliss of solitude that God had bestowed upon me. Because I remembered that no matter what I do and where I go, my happiness was the result of my thoughs. That it was far more important to live in the here and now than to live in the realm of expectations.

That happiness was a state of mind and I had complete control over it and that as long as I remembered this, I would always find my happy place within me.