Every time as I look out the window when the train halts for people to get down at that station, my brain goes on a rewind; forming pictures of the past flash before my eyes, making it so surreal that as the train starts again, it jolts me back to the present.
There’s a certain vibe to the whole trips down the memory lane. Isn’t it?
How they can get you trapped back in a time that is lost and you so desperately try to cling on to it. As if that’s going to bring back the time or the people back in your life.
Most often it’s the regrets attached to those times that you’ve locked in deep drawers of your heart, that have your emotions scattered all over the place. Just when you think that you’re okay, a different kind of pain is unleashed, too much for this feable heart to take on.
Then there are also people from your past that don’t make it to your present. Maybe they hurt you, or you broke their heart in some way, or maybe you simply just grew out of each other. Whatever the reason, the heart still wants to feel the warmth of their affection that you once thought will last forever.
But amidst all the sad and hearbreaking realisations, there is something soothing too about nostalgia. Because when you look around, you are amazed to see how many people made it to your present and your heart swells with contentment. You can count your blessings because no matter what boiled down then, you survived and are living the life that you once dreamt about, or at least moving in that direction.
You are filled with a new sense of hope that uplifts you every morning. Because you’ve grown out of the person you once were and are ready to embrace each day as a new adventure. You decide to shine even if it’s hail rain or sunshine because you know, it’s the choices that you make today, that will make all the difference when you play the rewind button tomorrow.
And if it isn’t so. If you still don’t find yourself on the path you’d laid out for yourself, if you still struggle to wake up every morning and put on a happy face, then don’t worry. You can still start today! You can still make all the difference in the world. You’ve only got to believe in yourself. Remind yourself that you’ve made it this far. What’s to stop you to go where you want to?
You only need a little more conviction. And a small leap of faith.